Mayai fry(or choma if u add a few mins at the end)

This is a recipe..It might or might not work for you, bt it does for me . . .Some times :)

So u want to cook an egg..But you got to Facebook or tweet still..Hmmm..Ok, lets see

1. Put your phone in the charger, or pocket (mobile Facebookers an Tweeple)

2. Make sure u hav al the ingredients. In this case, an egg and some fat/oil will do.You can write down the rest as we go on.

3. Kata kata kitunguu kwa (cut an onion into a) pan, put the oil in and put it on fire. At this point, u can check ur facebook notifications, retweets, mentions ,mgs, change status or read other peoples stuff. Except some peoples  notes, they are always long na kitunguu itaungua (and the onion will burn) .

4. Im assuming u aren't dum,so when the kitunguu iko (onion is) goldn brown, put nyanya (tomatoes). I prefer 1 big 1. Do that thng wit the spoon (read stir.. I guess :) mpaka nyanya ikuwe pasty, or sticky, depending where u bought them.

5. At ths point, you cn add al those other wierd things, hoho, biriganya, dania, masala, garlic .Etc. (google them)

6. Beat the egg on2 the pan, or in2 a cup if u aren't sure ni poa and do that thng wit the spoon, vigorously B4 it sticks 2 the pan until it coagulates(@!#* whatever that means), at ths point, you can add anything thats already cooked. e.g Rice, ug, mboga, spagz, gith,etc. (Google them)

7. Continue doing that thing with the spoon and  you can start eating .You can also update ur status or comment or re-tweet or whatever it is that you do best.

8. Poesha moto, and eat from the pan, or leav it longer, see what comes of it, and give it a name!..Later consume it at ur own risk.

9. There u hav it! Ofcourse its easier 2 jus beat an egg over sm hot fat but hey, we can always get more creative..Im thinkin of a creative way 2 cook ugali..Hmmmm, any Ideas?